miss anya in my life

i used to have more to say i guess; i used to write a lot more often.

i sat down today after saying goodbye to anya last night, wishing that she was free to say more in her 'blog' than she is (i then reprimanded myself for not having been more forward to seek her out in places where she could say more, such as skype). i miss her thoughts, which are often so unlike mine, and so refreshing.

i miss her heart, which belives so strongly in humility and simplicity and love.

and i asked myself where i had failed to believe so strongly in humility and simplicity. i found one answer in a place i thought was unlikely: an erwin mcmanus book that i saw katie thompson reading last summer and swiped from a roomate. and i realized that my lack of committment to humility and simplicity had led to at least one area of trouble for my life.

also last night (for whatever reason) we had the primaries on tv. and i admit (though sadly) that my change of heart over the last two years is more clearly shown by which candidate i support this year than in many other areas of my life. i support a candidate that my parents and many close friends would be ashamed of. but i beleive that while he does not necessarily know what is "best" for the "economy", he is committed to simplicity and equality, and a principle that it is better for all the shares of the pie to be big enough than for the pie itself to be bigger (economists will understand that picture).

i guess this has become rambling. what i want to say is: thank you anya for being key in the change that God has brought into my heart. you are in my thoughts and prayers as you go back to serve God more.